Smart Arse!!!!

Two businessmen in East Fremantle were sitting down for a break in their soon-to-be new shop… As yet, the shop wasn’t ready, with only a few shelves set up. One said to the other, “I bet any minute now some pensioner is going to walk by, put his face to the window, and ask what we’re selling.”

No sooner were the words out of his mouth when, sure enough, a curious old woman walked to the window, had a peek, and in a soft voice asked, What are you selling here?”

One of the men replied sarcastically, “We’re selling arse-holes.”

Without skipping a beat, the old dear said, ”Must be doing well… Only two left.”

Pensioners — don’t mess with them!!!!!!

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Touch Pilot Tonight On Fox

From writer/creator Tim Kring ( “Heroes,” “Crossing Jordan” ) and executive producers Peter Chernin (TERRA NOVA) and Katherine Pope (TERRA NOVA) comes TOUCH, a preternatural drama in which science and spirituality intersect with the hopeful premise that we are all interconnected, tied in invisible ways to those whose lives we are destined to alter and impact.

Through masterful storytelling, the series follows a group of seemingly unrelated characters – beginning with a former firefighter tormented by his inability to save a dying woman, an Iraqi teenager who will go to great risks to help his family, a gifted singer whose actions at a karaoke bar save lives thousands of miles away and a British businessman desperately trying to retrieve a key piece of information from his lost mobile phone – who affect each other in ways seen and unseen.

At the center is MARTIN BOHM ( Kiefer Sutherland, “24″ ), a widower and single father, haunted by an inability to connect to his mute, severely autistic 11-year-old son, JAKE. Caring, intelligent and thoughtful, Martin has tried everything to reach his son who shows little emotion and never allows himself to be touched by anyone, including Martin. Jake busies himself with cast-off cell phones, disassembling them and manipulating the parts, allowing him to see the world in his own special way.

After multiple failed attempts at keeping Jake in school, Martin is visited by social worker CLEA HOPKINS, who insists on doing an evaluation of the Bohms’ living situation. Although new at her job, Clea sees a man whose life has become dominated by a child he can no longer control. She believes his attempts to communicate with Jake are just wish fulfillment, and determines that it’s time for the state to intervene. But everything changes when Martin discovers that Jake possesses a gift of staggering genius – the ability to see things that no one else can, the patterns that connect everything. Jake is indeed communicating after all. But it’s not with words, it’s with numbers. And now he needs Martin to decipher their meaning and connect these numbers to the cast of seemingly unrelated characters whose lives they affect.

Along the way, Martin will be guided by BORIS PODOLSKY, a discredited aging professor who offers Martin a compelling but unorthodox theory about Jake and his rare ability. Whether it be chance, coincidence, timing, synergy or fate, there are events that touch us all, as part of an interconnected, dazzlingly precise universe.

via-Fox

The previews looked pretty interesting, I hope they weren’t just the high points of the series like they normally do with their trailers and preview commercials.

Anyway, it’s Pilot episode is on tonight. I have my PVR set to record it because I’ll be working.

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The True Meaning Of Friendship

Here, share this with everyone you care about.

Real friends stick together when times are tough,

 

They're always there with a shoulder to lean on,

And to lend an ear to your problems.

Friendship is when people know all about you but like you anyway,

Regardless of size,

How much money you have,

Shape,

Color,

Species,

or Age.

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Pimp My Cube Update

This is a Sponsored post written by me on behalf of Contest Factory for SocialSpark. All opinions are 100% mine.

 Are you still working in that cluttered and unorganized workspace normally referred as a  cube farm?

Well the Pimp My Cube Contest is still running and guess what? Apparently there have been little to no submissions so far and so that means your chances of winning are awesome! Plus the contest only runs from December 5th of last year till just to the end of this month January 31 2012! That’s just a week to get your submissions in!

Upload a video showing your crappy cube/office/workspace while you explain the details about why it is horrible and why it is so important that Contest Factory come in and ‘Pimp’ your filthy and unmanageable cube. You will get entry points for registering, voting, commenting and inviting others to register for the contest. The Grand Prize, approximate value of $1200, ‘Your Cube Pimped’  will be based on various criteria including the most votes, best (or really worst) video and most compelling story. You will get a new high end computer system, desk, chair, decorations, an Entertainment Package with high end stereo, espresso machine, and so on.

Upload your video from your Cell Phone or webcam, it’s really easy! Here’s an example….

The video should be funny, witty. The better the story, the funnier the video, the better chances of winning!

A second sweepstakes prize of a $200 gift card will be awarded to the registered user chosen by random drawing at the end of the contest period. But you don’t want that, you want the Grand Prize! Go for the GOLD!

Remember, you only have till 1/31/12 at 12:00PM or it’s all over for you. So you should really hurry the heck up and upload your video to the PMC Site! But this is just my opinion, and you’re entitled to it.

Visit Sponsor's Site

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A.A.A.D.D.. Know The Symptoms

Thank goodness there’s a name for this disorder.

Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder.

This is how it manifests:

I decide to water my garden.. As I turn on the hose in the driveway, I look over at my car and decide it needs washing.

As I start toward the garage, I notice mail on the porch table that I brought up from the mail box earlier.

I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car.

I lay my car keys on the table, put the junk mail in the garbage can under the table, and notice that the can is full.

So, I decide to put the bills back on the table and take out the garbage first..

But then I think, since I’m going to be near the mailbox when I take out the garbage anyway, I may as well pay the bills first..

I take my check book off the table, and see that there is only one check left. My extra checks are in my desk in the study, so I go inside the house to my desk where I find the can of Pepsi I’d been drinking.

I’m going to look for my checks, but first I need to push the Pepsi aside so that I don’t accidentally knock it over.

The Pepsi is getting warm, and I decide to put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold.

As I head toward the kitchen with the Pepsi, a vase of flowers on the counter catches my eye–they need water.

I put the Pepsi on the counter and discover my reading glasses that I’ve been searching for all morning. I decide I better put them back on my desk, but first I’m going to water the flowers.

I set the glasses back down on the counter, fill a container with water and suddenly spot the TV remote. Someone left it on the kitchen table.

I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV, I’ll be looking for the remote, but I won’t remember that it’s on the kitchen table, so I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs, but first I’ll water the flowers.

I pour some water in the flowers, but quite a bit of it spills on the floor.

So, I set the remote back on the table, get some towels and wipe up the spill.

Then, I head down the hall trying to remember what I was planning to do.

At the end of the day:
The car isn’t washed,the bills aren’t paid, there is a warm can of Pepsi sitting on the counter, the flowers don’t have enough water, there is still only 1 check in my check book, I can’t find the remote, I can’t find my glasses, and I don’t remember what I did with the car keys.

Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got done today, I’m really baffled because I know I was busy all damn day, and I’m really tired.

I realize this is a serious problem, and I’ll try to get some help for it, but first I’ll check my e-mail….

Do me a favor. Share this message to everyone you know, because I don’t remember who I’ve shared it with.

Don’t laugh — if this isn’t you yet, your day is coming!!

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I Can See Clearly Now…..

Well, it has been about nine months since I first put on a pair of eyeglasses back in May of last year and I am happy to report that these glasses that I got from Zenni Optical are still doing their job and are in the same great shape as they were when I first bought them and I wear these things all day, every day.

Now I don’t mind plugging the web site at all because I believe it’s a shame for people who need to wear eyeglasses to have to pay the outrageous prices they charge at normal eyeglasses stores. Zenni Optical is the #1 online eyeglasses store offering high quality prescription eyeglasses from $6.95.

So, seeing how Valentine’s Day is just around the corner and I know a lot of people who like to keep their fashion thing going. Zenni Optical offers all kinds of frame styles at such great prices, why not get a pair of Valentine’s Day glasses for the special person in your life? Or yourself even?

Although they do offer eyeglasses starting off at $6.95, my pair was around $50, so I don’t know what those one are like. But $50 for a pair of eyeglasses that would otherwise have cost anywhere between $300 and $500 at a nearby eyeglass store is a win. So in my opinion, that you’re entitled to, I’m still ahead of the game.

Seriously, don’t throw away your money on overpriced eyeglasses and check out Zenni. Use that extra money you save  to buy ME gifts!!! :P

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I Said I Wanted a PURPLE MONKEY DISHWASHER!!!

No, no, no, no, noooooo!

This will not do!

I explicitly asked for a Purple Monkey Dishwasher and this is not Purple.

You’re going to have to send this one back. Sorry.

 

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Kim Jong Il Mourners Fake – Video From Justin Bieber Concert!

It’s pretty sad that Korea would take such a happy moment like *cough* Sweet, *cough: brat* little Canadian Justin Bieber  *cough: pull yer fucking pants up you fucking douche* in concert and use the audience enjoying his sweet *cough: great kid but now  fame made him a DICK* music and video and make the rest of the Korean public look like they were morning for a TYRANT like Justin Bieber, ERR… Ooops I mean  Kim Jong Il…

People look up to idols in weird ways. Some, a kid who wears his pants halfway to his knees, and others who kill people. Both bad influences IMO. But that IS just my opinion and you’re entitled to it!

 

 

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